The term comes from Greek mythology, where the young Narcissus fell in love with his own image reflected in a pool of water. Narcissism is a concept in psychoanalytic theory, which was popularly introduced in Sigmund Freud's essay On Narcissism (1914). The American Psychiatric Association has listed the classification narcissistic personality disorder in its Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) since 1968, drawing on the historical concept of megalomania.
You may think you have an extremely low self-esteem.
You may think that you have an extremely low self-esteem. You may also think this is normal, and that everyone feels the same way. This is not true! If you are in a relationship with a person who has narcissistic tendencies or is even full-on a narcissist, then there’s no doubt that they will make you feel like you are worthless and useless. However, this isn't something that only happens to people with low self-esteem; it happens to everyone who has been in these types of relationships.
The reason why so many people think they have low self-esteem when really it's just because of their relationship with the narcissist is because when we were kids growing up our parents didn't give us enough praise for all the things we did right or good deeds we accomplished. Instead our parents would always point out what we did wrong instead of what we did right or how great something was going for us (but only if it went well). So now as adults when someone says something negative about another person (especially themselves) they immediately start thinking: "Oh my goodness I'm such an awful person." But when someone tells them how great they are at something they automatically think: "Why wouldn't anyone else see me as being fantastic?"
They will convince you that you are the reason the relationship is failing.
Narcissists are experts at shifting blame. The narcissist will always make you feel like the problem in your relationship, but they will never take responsibility for it. If something goes wrong, it is because of something you did or didn’t do. This creates a constant state of anxiety for the victim because they never know what will push their partner over the edge and cause an outburst or argument.
This also means that if there are problems in your relationship with your narcissist, it is up to you to fix them without any help from him or her! This can be incredibly frustrating when all you want is for things to get better and he won’t even acknowledge that there may be a problem!
That feeling of being special to your partner only lasts until they no longer need something from you.
It's hard to understand how someone can treat you like a servant when they were once your partner and lover. You may have been enjoying the feeling of being special and unique to them, but it doesn't take long before they lose interest in you. Once they no longer need something from you, they will discard you like an old rag doll. And while at first they will be kind and caring toward you, soon enough their true self will come out as they treat you like a servant or object without any respect or consideration for what is best for your well-being or happiness.
This is especially true if this person is narcissistic because narcissists are incapable of loving others on an equal basis. They need others around them so that there can be this constant stream of attention fueling their ego needs—but once those needs have been met then it's all over between the two parties involved! This means that even if someone does care about another person (as some people might), once their time together comes to an end then there won't be any sentimentality left behind--just cold indifference towards each other."
Narcissists will use your own insecurities against you.
A narcissist will use your own insecurities against you. If you have self-esteem issues, they'll constantly remind you that there are other people out there who are better than you, or they will tell you that they don't like what they see when they look at you. They may even encourage bad habits such as substance abuse or gambling.
A narcissist will also use your vulnerabilities against you by picking on a part of yourself that is weak and vulnerable to attack. They might single out something about your appearance, personality, background or past mistakes as a way of putting down any confidence or esteem in which the target has invested themselves. A narcissist does this because it's easier for them to control someone who lacks self-esteem than someone who feels good about himself/herself; so if he/she can break their target's self-esteem then he/she knows what buttons need pressing whenever he/she wants control over their target again (i.e., "I'm not listening unless I'm told why I should").
They cannot accept blame for anything that goes wrong in the relationship.
A narcissist will never accept blame for anything that goes wrong in the relationship. They will make you feel like every single thing that goes wrong is your fault, even if it isn't. They will also make you feel responsible for how they feel about themselves, which is a way of making sure that no matter what happens, it's still all about them.
This is why discussing difficult issues can be so difficult; because everything becomes a power struggle and an act of manipulation rather than an effort to work through something together and move forward as a couple or family unit (if applicable).
When you bring up any problems you're having—whether they be with your partner or another member of the family—a narcissist won't take responsibility at all; instead they'll deflect blame onto someone else (you), play the victim card and refuse to own up when things go wrong on their watch. This leads us neatly into our next section:
Your life will be a constant cycle of highs and lows.
When you are involved with a narcissist, your life will be a constant cycle of highs and lows. The narcissist will make you feel incredibly special and loved. You may find yourself thinking that this is the most romantic relationship ever. Then, suddenly, they turn on you and treat you like they don’t even know who you are.
The reason for this sudden change in behavior is because narcissists cannot love unconditionally. Instead, they require complete control over their victims so that they can feel good about themselves at all times (and avoid feeling anything else). This means that if something goes wrong—and it always does—the only person responsible for fixing it is YOU!
You may find yourself apologizing for things that are not your fault.
You may find yourself apologizing for things that are not your fault.
If you are in a relationship with a narcissist, there will be many instances where you feel as if your actions have caused the problems. That is not true. You did not do anything to cause the issues in your relationship and therefore should not be held responsible for them. If someone else is refusing to take responsibility for their own feelings or behavior, then it is up to them to figure out how to deal with those feelings or behaviors on their own time and at their own expense. They can decide whether or not they want help from professionals who specialize in working with people who have narcissistic personality disorder (NPD).
Their bad behavior becomes the norm and they do not take responsibility for their actions.
The narcissist’s bad behavior becomes the norm and they do not take responsibility for their actions. They are still blaming you for everything that goes wrong in the relationship, but now they will also blame you for their own bad behavior. The narcissist's negative traits include:
- Lack of empathy
- Manipulation (including gaslighting)
- Blame & shame (doubling down on the victim blaming)
Narcissists are not capable of unconditional love.
What is unconditional love? It’s a feeling that goes beyond normal friendship and family ties. Unconditional love means that you can do nothing wrong, and your loved one will still be there for you no matter what.
When it comes to narcissists, this just isn’t possible. They are incapable of unconditional love because their entire identity depends on being the best at everything—and if they aren't the best, then they aren't happy or satisfied with themselves or their relationship with others (even when it involves someone who loves them). A narcissist will never feel satisfied by anyone else except themselves; therefore, they will always look for ways in which their partner could improve themselves so that their relationships can become more exciting and fulfilling (or so they think).
A narcissist needs a constant supply of validation, admiration, and praise from other people.
If you are currently in a relationship with a narcissist, you might wonder why they are constantly seeking validation, praise and admiration from others.
The answer is simple…because they need it! Narcissistic personalities need to be the center of attention and feel special all the time. They want everyone around them to think highly of them, as well as admire their many talents. If these needs aren't met then they will become angry or depressed. In order for this personality type to feel good about themselves day after day they need constant praise from others around them which can lead to the following:
If you are in a relationship with a narcissist, it can be very confusing and hurtful. They may try to convince you that they love you unconditionally but they really don't. In a healthy relationship, both people work together as equals to make their lives better. A narcissist will never see the relationship this way. They will always have the upper hand and you will be expected to do everything for them without asking anything in return. You may feel like your energy is being drained from your body because of all the emotional drama that takes place every day. You deserve better than this kind of treatment and so does anyone else who has ever been in a situation like yours!